SINGAPORE – An elderly woman suffers a sudden stroke and loses the ability to walk. Before she is discharged from the hospital, her children scramble to hire a domestic helper, as tensions rise over who is responsible for her long-term care.
While hypothetical, this scenario may reflect the reality some families face when caregiving plans for their loved ones are not discussed in advance.
Yet detailed conversations about future care arrangements remain uncommon. Several social service organisations told The Straits Times that discussions about death, illness and incapacity are still taboo in many Asian families.
Such conversations include parents discussing with children what to do if they fall seriously ill, or making long-term care plans for a family member with disabilities when the primary caregiver dies.
SPD’s chief executive Abhimanyau Pal said: “In some cases, conversations are only triggered after a health scare, hospitalisation or injury that raises concerns about what would happen if the primary caregiver is suddenly unable to provide care.”
June Sim, who heads TOUCH Community Services’ Caregivers Support Group, said cultural norms around filial piety may make it harder to discuss caregiving plans, because some parents think their children should naturally take on these duties.
Some also think “ignorance is bliss” and avoid having such discussions when family members are still healthy, said Teo Ying Ying, head of the social work department at the Home Nursing Foundation (HNF).
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