Motherhood in Singapore: Why I’d tell my daughters to wait

BEARING THE WEIGHT OF CARING FOR OTHERS

Growing up, I was often told that women can have it all: children, a thriving career, personal and professional growth, and a healthy marriage. But no one talks about how there are only 24 hours in a day and within those hours, the number of caregiving roles we are expected to juggle.

Although more men seem to be stepping up, women continue to make up the majority of informal caregivers. About 60 per cent of those who left the workforce due to caregiving needs in 2025 were women, according to Ministry of Manpower data.

This does not include women who cannot afford to stop working, even as they juggle informal caregiving. And did I mention that the White Paper on women’s development found that married women in dual-income households are five times more likely than men to be managing both household and caregiving responsibilities?

These invisible demands come at a cost. Studies have shown that female caregivers face higher risks of emotional distress, burnout, financial strain, and less personal savings for retirement.

Something had to give. For me, it was my full-time career, along with ambitions and plans for further studies when I became a first-time parent at 26.