SINGAPORE: An employer has shared her frustration online, saying she feels increasingly worn out trying to manage a sensitive domestic helper who has been with the family for just two months.
“I’m not looking for someone I need to constantly manage emotionally or ‘baby.’ I need someone who can work together with me to keep the household running smoothly,” she wrote in her post on the “Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid / Domestic Helper” group on Friday (Mar 20).
“I have a very hectic life to manage. I’m handling my kids and my home largely on my own, and what I truly need is support.”
In her post, the employer outlined several behaviours that have been bothering her. For a start, she said the helper rarely returns greetings or bothers to start them, yet complains if the household is quiet. She also refuses to help with simple tasks, such as carrying items when they come home, and rarely bothers to say thank you or apologise when she gets something wrong.
“Before anyone jumps to assumptions, YES, I do apologise and say thank you to her as much as I expect to receive; it’s basic manners,” the employer stressed.
The employer also pointed to a recurring pattern of behaviour. The helper would appear fine for a week or two, then suddenly become withdrawn or unhappy. At one point, she even posted on social media, saying things like “whatever I do feels wrong,” which left the employer perplexed, as nothing significant had occurred that day.
She added that on the day the post appeared, she had only given a few simple, straightforward instructions regarding household chores.
“At this point, I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. If I don’t say anything, things are not done properly. But if I give even simple instructions, it seems to make her feel like she’s being criticised,” she wrote.
Trying to strike a balance has left her completely drained. She said she has even started keeping quiet just to avoid upsetting the helper, though that has not exactly solved anything either.
