\n<\/p>\n
For as long as I can remember, I have been hounded to \u201ceat more\u201d and \u201cfinish all your food\u201d. The type of food didn\u2019t matter \u2013 I was offered chips, doughnuts and fried food to help me put on weight.<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cOw, you\u2019re so pokey, you bag of bones,\u201d my mother would exclaim when I sat on her lap as a child.<\/span><\/p>\n In primary school, I was placed on the \u201cmilk programme\u201d in my school. Every recess, underweight children like me would meet at the assigned canteen table, be handed a packet of milk to drink before we were allowed to buy food. But the milk made me too full to eat after.<\/span><\/p>\n In Primary Six, I was 1.56m tall and weighed 37.5kg.<\/span><\/p>\n I was given vitamins to increase my appetite and even went to the doctor for a stool test to check if I needed to be dewormed (parasitic worms can cause poor eating). Our family doctor concluded there was nothing wrong with me. His advice: \u201cJust eat more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n So, I did. During the school holidays, I ate every four hours \u2013 McDonald\u2019s Big Macs were my go-to, mainly because of the fast food chain\u2019s S$5 meal promotion. Nutrition was not the goal \u2013 weight gain was.<\/span><\/p>\n Moving to secondary school, the male gaze was now upon me. The cousin closest in age to me was a boy, so I inherited his group of friends as well.<\/span><\/p>\n They would say things like: \u201cJill, whatever you do, don\u2019t turn sideways or we won\u2019t be able to see you!\u201d \u201cQuick, lie down, that plane looks like it needs to land.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nENCOUNTERING THE MALE GAZE AS A TEENAGER<\/span><\/h2>\n